Let's see if this post comes out somewhat coherent.. please ignore any typos, for my fingers don't really feel like they are still attached to my spinal cord...HAH.
I have been playing "Big Tough Girl" with all this surgery stuff- well, except for when I first got there. The minute I had to put on the hospital gown (which, oddly enough, could be hooked up to an AIR HOSE that would pump in cool or warmed air- that TOTALLY creeped me out) I lost it. Totally. I couldn't stop crying.
So they had to sedate me. After it took 8 ATTEMPTS to get an IV into my skinny little veins (the only things on me that ARE skinny) the nurse asks me if I drink.
WHA?
This sedative, she told me, feels a lot like being drunk. I then asked if I would soon start talking loudly and telling dirty jokes.
I don't remember much after that.
When I came to about 6 hours later, I thought they had tied me to the bed and piled rocks- heated rocks- all over my body. Turns out I was buried under 6 blankets and I had on these lovely "thrombosis stockings" that were massaging my calves (oooh, a SPA treatment) to prevent blood clots.
So in order to use the bathroom, I have to disconnect the air hoses to my legs, take off the nasal oxygen thingie, and drag the IV cart with me. Good times.
Every time I did this, all these alarms would start whooping. As if its a national emergency that I have to pee.
By the next morning I am stalking the halls of the hospital, dragging my IV cart behind me like a sullen pet dog, demanding that someone take this d@mn IV out so I can go home. Seriously, I went to the admin desk and made them page my doctor. In my hospital robe and nasty unwashed hair, 10 bruises up and down my arms from the futile needle sticks, and my neck swathed in white tape.
I come from good, strong German stock. We don't admit to pain- EVER. I saw my dad almost sever his thumb from his hand with a haycutter. He wrapped it up in the everpresent red hanky he carried, he soaked it in Epsom Salts every night, and that was it. Hey, I am not in pain!! I am fine, great! Bring on the Jello!
I should know by now to ALWAYS ASK FOR A PRESCRIPTION. DUH.
All is good, now- I am have been rather b!tchy to my poor mom, and just cranky in general. I can't turn my head, and lifting up my arms to wash my hair (OMG, that was the best thing EVER!!) hurt like mad.
So, I got some meds....and even though i still technically hurt, its as if I am watching a movie of it. I can deal.
Just don't tell my German grandmother
MK